What does it mean to be a Daddy Dom and why do Kittens like it so much?
Why is it that it’s quite commonplace for people to openly discuss their desire to be choked in the bedroom, yet talking about your Daddy kink will have some people looking at you like you just said you wanted to jump into bed with their dog?
Having a Daddy kink is nothing to be ashamed of, yet many people feel embarrassed of this kink because of the fear of what people might say. But a Daddy kink doesn’t have anything to do with a person’s own father, nor does it mean they have “Daddy issues”.
Do you like the thought of being called Daddy? If so, what is it about being called Daddy that turns you on? I’ve met a few people who have Daddy kinks, and it’s become clear to me that there are two different ways people are experiencing it – the first being as a power-play dynamic, and the being as a forbidden love role play.
What is a Daddy Dom dynamic?
The Daddy Dom dynamic is a common BDSM fantasy role play. It’s just like a Dominant and Submissive dynamic, except age becomes one of the main turn-ons in the role play. Have you ever fantasised about having sex with an older man? Does their experience, wisdom and authority turn you on? Well, this is kinda where Daddy kinks come from.
This particular type of Dominant and Submissive dynamic is known in the BDSM world as DD/LG, which stands for Daddy Dom / Little Girl, and the kink is centred around age play, with the submissive taking on a much younger persona than they really are. The age that they play could be anywhere from a baby through to a teenager, and I can see how people who don’t have a Daddy kink may begin to question this type of fantasy. Just to be totally clear, a Daddy Dom dynamic has nothing to do with incest, or wanting to fuck your dad!
What is age play?
Age play is a style of role-play, which involves one or both partners taking on a different age – either much younger or older. The desire to play the role of someone younger often comes from a place of wanting the other to take authority, not just via dominance, but through caregiving too. A Daddy Dom’s role can be to dominate and discipline the Little (the submissive). They may set rules, tell them off, and subsequently punish them for being naughty; this is where other forms of BDSM come into play, such as spanking. The masochist in me finds something particularly sexy about being told I’m a “bad girl” who needs to be punished. It’s a feeling that I can only describe as pride when being called a “good girl” for taking all of my spanks like the good little masochist I am!
But DD/LG dynamics don’t always have to be sexual, and there’s a whole other side to Daddy kink that is all about caregiving. Aftercare is a huge part of BDSM, but when it comes to DD/LG, care can be one of the primary reasons for indulging in this kink. Do you ever have those days where you just wish you could be like a kid again, without any responsibilities or cares in the world? Now wouldn’t it be great to feel that way, but with the added benefit of incredible sex too? What’s that I hear you say? Yes, Daddy?
This dynamic shows a softer, more romantic side to BDSM than that of a Master/Slave dynamic. For example, with a Daddy Dom, the Little can forget about their responsibilities in the outside world, and instead become “Daddy’s little Princess”, letting their partner take care of them as they see fit. When they enter into this role play, it is known as “Little Space”. The Little may wish to carry out non-sexual activities that a younger person would enjoy such as colouring (it’s no secret that many of us enjoy a good adult colouring book). This dynamic isn’t just reserved for male Doms and female Littles either. Just as there is a Daddy kink, there is a Mommy kink, too. So if you like the idea of female domination in bed, then say hello to Mommy. Age play could be your kink!
Daddy kinks and forbidden love
The other way a Daddy kink can be interpreted (and this is my personal favourite) is as an indulgence in forbidden love role plays. This doesn’t have to be the literal daddy-daughter role play that you might find in taboo porn scenarios, it can be any figure of authority who is close to you who would traditionally be “off-limits”.
I’m sure we could all admit a time that we’ve fantasised about someone we shouldn’t, or had a naughty dream that made us feel embarrassed yet incredibly damp between our thighs. This could be your teacher, your babysitter, your Dad’s best friend, your mum’s boyfriend, your boss, anyone in your life that you find hot because you know that society deems it wrong to fuck them. A big part of the Daddy kink appeal is erotic humiliation; to experience feelings of naughtiness and shame when fucking someone you know you shouldn’t. That’s what attracts people to the Daddy kink, and I can see why!
‘Teacher and student’ has got to be a classic favourite for many, myself included. This age play/role play incorporates all of the kinks and desires I’ve just explained. Getting dressed up as a sexy school girl/boy and being told to bend over their desk to be spanked for being naughty, and then ending with some steamy sex that you know is wrong – yes please Daddy!
Just like with any BDSM dynamic, as long as there’s clear, consent and communication involved – go fucking wild with your role-play scenarios. Whether you simply enjoy being called a “good girl” after a spanking, or you like to dress up in pigtails and an adult diaper to be read a bedtime story, own it and enjoy it unashamedly.
If you’d like to explore other forms of BDSM then check out the kink section of our education centre, and keep an eye out for our latest events and workshops on all things BDSM and kink.