Help with sexual fulfillment for couples
I often see mixed gender couples who are experiencing sexual disconnection. This can be for several reasons, but often it is to do with the female not being able to reach sexual fulfillment (usually reaching orgasm with the partner) and the male either being too reticent or speedy or merely unaware of how to stimulate his partner to help her achieve orgasm. In these cases, I recommend the couple first to come to see me for a Psychosensual Treatment. This is a three-hour appointment that combines both explorative frank conversation about their sexual environment and desires and then followed by a 90-minute sensual bodywork session finishing with final 30-minute overview chat.
The Psychosensual Treatment
The appointment starts with an hour mentoring during which I explore the emotional dynamic of the couple around sex and investigate how any early life experiences maybe effecting this and how they may be causing a conflict between the couple and thus causing the disconnection, frustration and maybe a loss of libido even attraction for one another.
The Sensual Bodywork
Once I have this information, and if the couple is happy to go forward with the sensual bodywork, I create a massage that provides an experience that circumnavigates the usual sexual dynamics experienced historically to give a different experience for the both of them. Depending on the issue being dealt with this can be given as a single massage to one or other with the other partner either watching the whole massage or part watching and then joining in, or giving the massage with me throughout. Or with an extension to the time, it can be split into two massages one for each of the couple with the same options above. In essence, the massage can be tailored to fit with the couples needs and desires.
Continuing the Sensual and Sexual Journey
After this first appointment couples sometimes feel able to continue on their own. However often with this whole new relationship to sex and intimacy revealed to them they come back and take more appointments. This may be further Psychosensul treatments or just come for sensual bodywork in the Couples Massages. For ongoing sexual relationship development, I often recommend couple take either a private workshop with me or attend one of the couples group workshops I periodically run in conjunction with Killing Kittens
What does this achieve
By talking things through with me, I can help you understand how your sexual behaviour is connected to your overall emotional dynamic and how for all of us this stems from unconscious strategies developed in early life. By looking back at a time when your emotions were being developed, and how your environment and the people within it influenced that development, I can create a treatment that provides an alternative experience that helps stop your mental strategies being triggered. Receiving sensual massage quietens the mind and the hormones produced are the same that are released when we have good sex. Dopamine, Oxytocic are released when we are touched, this relaxes and arouses at the same time and creates a sense of trust which leads to the body responding and arousal increases. Often the arousal reaches a level that has not been felt before and often in women will result in orgasm or even multiple orgasms and in men erection orgasm at the moment when it is wanted.
Angry Elephant to Happy Heard
Coming to see me for any treatment or workshop gives a couple both a new perspective on how to relate to sex and sexual intimacy and to understand how vital foreplay and sex play is to maintaining a fulfilling sex life. After a little as two to three years, sexual intimacy for couples in a close relationship can become sedentary, boring and unfulfilling even antagonistic. By renegotiating the sexual relationship and hearing how each relates to sex a couple can transform their sexual and intimate connection. Hearing the wants they each have, the desires they may fantasise and understanding any fears and curiosities they may have, an unfulfilled couple can transform the sex in the relationship from being like the angry elephant in the room to become like a heard of elephants roaming free on the plains of Africa!
You don’t need a reason to enjoy sex, it’s a basic human right
Sexual intimacy and sexual pleasure may appear to be mostly a physical thing, but without the right mental environment, the most crucial and healthy part of being human becomes a silent war zone that can eventually cause break up ill health and bitterness. To come to see someone like myself should not be seen as a desperate move but a brave and sensible decision.
Let me help you get motoring
If you were a lousy car driver because you were not taught to drive correctly, or you did not know how a car properly works, your driving would be dangerous to both yourself and others and of course, you would not hesitate to go take some lessons in becoming a better driver. Sex is no different, sadly many people don’t get taught how to have sex they learn to have sex like someone leaning over the back seat of a car watching someone else drive. Think of me as that expert driver bit this time you are in the passenger seat next to me. We go driving together, at your speed in your desired direction and at any time you can say slow down, turn left or right, even stop. But the drive is real, and my aim to soon have you driving on your own, going where you want with whom you want for as long as you want.
Where do couples see me
I usually see couples in my treatment rooms in Battersea central London but upon request, I can see a couple in their own location whether in the UK or abroad.
An investment that can change your life
Investing in becoming a more accomplished driver would probably make you a better driver than 75% of other drivers on the road. The same goes for investing in your sex life. Understanding one’s own sexual psychology and physiology, as well as your partners, means you can communicate better about what you like, don’t like or want to explore. Understanding the psychology behind a desire, fantasy or fetish helps a couple journey together whether the motivation is the same or different. A sexual experience had clandestinely often irreparably damages the relationship whereas a sexual experience discussed understood and shared can deepen a relationship.
Read more and view the appointment types available for couples Here
Hi, my name is Colin, and I have been working in the field of psychosexual health and well-being since 2005. In this time I have helped over 6000 people and in the process discovered many different approaches to dealing with sexual challenges that are not generally covered by conventional methods.