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Tips & Techniques

How Do You Introduce Sex Toys Into The Bedroom?

Here, KK explores how to introduce different sex toys into your partnered play. We even include some of our favorite toys to help start you off...
by KK
16 Dec 2018

UPDATED: 2 Nov 2022

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED: 16 Dec 2018

Introducing sex toys into your sex with a partner can be somewhat daunting, especially if it’s something that has never been discussed before. However, it can really add another dimension of pleasure to your sex life, and it can make sex feel new and exciting in seconds.

So! How do you introduce a vibrator or toy into your bedroom repertoire? 

How To Introduce a Sex Toy Into The Bedroom

Have you ever wanted to say something but you were afraid of how it might come out? Ever chickened out and put it in a text message instead? There is no difference here – if you’re feeling a little awkward or uncomfortable about asking verbally, then feel free to open up a Whatsapp and send your partner/s a little message. Perhaps send them a link to a few sex toys you have been interested in, or ask them if they have ever used anything like this before. You can go into more depth later on, but this just breaks the ice and lets your other half know that you’re into giving this a go. 

Keep the way you are asking curious and light-hearted. Have a giggle about it, and reassure your partner that it is 100% not to replace them. Many times, the reason someone will tense up at the introduction  of a sex toy is because they feel that their original performance was not good enough, and that their partner is not satisfied with the sex they are currently having. However, if you explain to them that it’s simply to try something new and that the introduction of a sex toy is not in any way to replace them, then using a toy will automatically become a lot more appealing.

Sharing is Caring!

It could be worthwhile browsing through the options together, and having shared ownership or excitement over the device/s you choose. Like anything, it’s important to get used to something before you expect life changing results. Think back to your first time doing anything – with time, experimentation, and practice you learned what you like. This is no different. So don’t splurge all your money on a sex toy that you haven’t tried before that is really high tech. Work up to that once you know that this toy is the right size, material, shape and style for you.

Have a stroll through this non-exhaustive list of great toys to use with a partner, and make sure you also check out our other toy related articles on the blog, such as this list of the best non gendered sex toys

Editor’s Note: Though endorsed as a shops by the author, the sites below may contain language around bodies and experiences that is limited in how it addresses gender beyond binary conceptions. We would like to inform our intersex, trans, non-binary, and gender-expansive readers in advance of visiting the site.

  1. WeVibe Match Partner Vibrator

This beauty is perfect for use with a partner. You can actually insert this technical little toy during sex. It comes with a remote, which allows you to hand over your pleasure to your partner. 

While the shape is a little unique and different, don’t let that put you off. This vibrator allows internal and external pleasure for you both, whatever the dynamic of your relationship. It’s also rechargeable and has a charging cable that comes with it (just like your phone), and a beautiful silk bag that it can live in. Furthermore, it’s more or less silent, and the shape of it makes the toy discreet. Finally, it’s waterproof!

  1. Lelo – Tiani 2

This toy is made out of very soft silicone, which encourages maximum comfort and pleasure. It also comes with a wireless remote, much like the WeVibe toy above. Again, this means that the intensity and vibration speed can be altered depending on what you want. With a total of 8 different vibration modes, you’re sure to find the perfect one for you – AND the vibrations are said to be up to 50% more powerful than most toys on the market. This toy is  rechargeable, too, ensuring that you don’t have to buy batteries all the time.

  1. MysteryVibe – Crescendo

The word ‘crescendo’ means ‘the highest point reached in a progressive increase of intensity,’ which is a perfect title for this toy. It’s a bit of a funny shape, looking slightly like a boomerang, but the shape is what will help you access a whole load of pleasure. This luxury vibrator allows personalised experiences for each user, with the idea in mind that no two people are the same, so why should their sex toy experiences be? There is a downloadable app that works in tandem with this toy, ensuring that it learns each curve and pulse within you to maximize the pleasure it provides. 

  1. The Clio – Love Balls

This  toy is a little different from the previous three. These balls double up as a pelvic floor trainer, as well as a sensual delight. Slip them in whilst you are pleasuring your partner to ensure both of you are receiving sensual sensations. 

So all in all, make sure you introduce the idea of using a toy delicately. Give your partner/s the option to look at the toys with you, as they will then feel more involved in the process, and start small. Here’s tohoping your extra addition will elevate your sex life from the sky into the stars!