A book review from within the KK family! We bring you the Sayle matriarch’s newly published book, Don’t Bother to Dress Up.
Maly Sayle’s book looks at middle age, divorce, dementia, living in a room surrounded by condoms and signing up to a dating website at the age of 56. Ever wanted a little insight into the lives of the Sayles? Then buy Maly’s book here.
Suddenly single at 56, with a whole heap of reality to deal with, Maly’s real life experience is weaved through the book. It’s a story of heartbreak and hope. Maly’s resilience, along with some dark humour, makes this a compelling and incredibly relatable read for anyone who has been dealt a hand that was not part of life’s plan.
Here Teddie James writes about her own experiences of growing older, and what she enjoyed most about Maly’s book.
In my head, I am still the same woman I was at 21.
As each year passes I evolve, I learn and experience more of life. I know what I want and what I don’t want, including in my sex life.
My sexual appetite is just the same as it was in my twenties. In truth it’s actually far more refined. I’m not afraid to express what I like and what I don’t, and I know how to self-pleasure pretty damn well now. Learning to know and love your body really helps with sexual confidence. I have learnt to accept my body exactly as it is. My age, to me, is a positive, not a negative. I simply know my body better, it also helps to have a dirty mind!
To me, sex is equally about the mind as it is the body. To be honest, most of the time I fall in love, or lust with the person’s mind. The body comes after – if you’ll excuse the pun.
Halle Berry, 54, says
“A magical thing happened when I turned 40 – a light sort of went off, and I felt more self-assured and confident, like I finally had the right to be authentic about who I am, to say what I want to say. I guess that comes with getting older’.
Sexual confidence comes from within. There is no such thing as the perfect body. We all have imperfections, it’s about accepting them. We are all perfectly imperfect and all beautiful in our own way. It’s all about how we feel about ourselves that matters. Age is truly just a number, as cliché as that sounds.
Life is a journey full of twists and turns, some good, some bad, some unexpected. Sometimes relationships don’t work out how you expect them to. Sometimes we fall in love with people we’re not meant to, sometimes our partners do.
These can be immensely traumatic times. One day you’re all cozied up on the sofa with your partner, playing happy families and the next you’re scrolling through Tinder or standing in a bar with your girlfriends wondering what the hell happened.
Admittedly, divorce or separation is a very emotional time, but age can never be an excuse not to get back on the horse again, when you’re ready.
Dust yourself off and remember who the hell you are. This is not a time to be self-pitying, this is your time. This is your next chapter! You hold the pen. This is your story.
In her debut book, Maly Sayle writes from the heart, recounting her experiences and retelling them with humour, honesty and heartfelt emotion. As I read, I couldn’t help putting myself in her shoes and thinking what I would done. I would like to think I would have the strength, humour, honesty and confidence Sayle had.
I only hope Sayle writes another book, because I, for one, can’t wait to hear what happened next.
BY TEDDIE JAMES