Health & Wellness

Tips for Massaging Penises

Jessica Parker Returns With Her Guide To Massaging Penises
by KK
12 Aug 2020

UPDATED: 14 Nov 2022


We spoke with Jessica Parker about the all important basics to cover when it comes to Penis Massage. Top Tip: If you’re feeling like trying these out in person after you read, but want some more in-person explanation, head to our events and book onto one of our sensual massage workshops!

First Penis Massage Tip: Soft or Hard?

One of the main benefits of penis massage is that there is no pressure to perform, be erect, ejaculate, orgasm – it can simply be a moment of surrendering into receiving pleasure passively. Varying pressure (light or firm touch) and pace (fast or slow movements) can help attune your massage to whatever stage the penis is at – soft, semi-hard or hard.

Slow down your strokes if they want to breathe and hang out in a certain level of arousal. You can hold and pulse both of your hands around the penis shaft as they observe sensations and thought patterns when they’re not erect. The person receiving the massage should never feel any pressure to be hard, or to be in performance mode. This is a moment for them to be receptive, and to experience pleasure and reflection.

Second Penis Massage Tip: Whole-Body Approach

Yes you’re massaging the penis, but in order to create full-body sensations a few full-body strokes in between each penis massage stroke can help allow the whole body to relax, let go and fully receive. Experiment with massaging the thighs, the chest, shoulders, even the head and neck before moving back to touching the penis.

Third Penis Massage Tip: Feedback

Every penis is different so be sure to talk first to get an idea of what sort of sensations your partner normally likes. They may want to show and demonstrate areas or strokes they particularly like or don’t want which will help you navigate and attune to their reactions.

For example, the head/tip of the penis might have a very tight foreskin or become too sensitive with too much touch, or the testicles may like light scratching with fingernails or just super careful light smooth strokes.

Keep checking in and watching their body language as you massage. You can help by guiding with questions, such as “how does this feel?”, “would you like me to slow down?”, or offering options “do you like this [demonstrate one kind of touch] or this [demonstrate another kind of touch]?” Using closed questions, or offering just two options, are a good way to help some people feel safer in communicating their needs, whereas open questions can more accurately represent the range of possibilities on offer. There’s always more than two choices!

Fourth Penis Massage Tip: Afterwards

One of the main things I see when teaching clients penis massage is that once they feel it is finished or their partner has ejaculated the ‘magic’ massage moment is over and hands are quickly off the body and into cleaning up mode. After lots of lovely sensual attention the last thing you want to do is anything quickly!

Allow time to leave your hands to hold and be still on the penis or hips/stomach, and slowly breathe with your partner before slowly detaching or changing position/cleaning hands etc. You may want to finish with a head and neck massage, or foot massage, or run a bath to share together – whatever you decide, allow for slow endings and stillness/space afterwards.

Want to learn more about penis massage?

Make sure you check out our upcoming workshops and masterclasses!