Sometimes working out sexual dissonance in a couple can be tough without an extra helping hand…or two. Here, the KK team take a look at psychosensual massage as a therapy for helping to resolve sexual difficulties or unhappiness in partnerships.
Psychosensual Therapy Treatment
The goal of these appointments is to provide help for couples, and individuals, to find sexual fulfillment through massage. The appointment starts with an hour mentoring during which a massage therapist will explore the emotional dynamic of the couple around sex, and investigate how life experiences maybe effecting the individuals in the couple. The therapist will also explore how previous life experiences may be causing conflict within the couple and thus causing disconnection, frustration and a potential loss of libido, or attraction, for one another.
The Sensual Massage Bodywork
Once the therapist has this information, and if the couple is happy to go forward with the sensual bodywork, the therapist creates a sensual massage for couples. This provides an experience that circumnavigates the usual sexual dynamics experienced by the couple to give different experiences for the both of them. Depending on the issues being addressed, the first sensual massage can be given as a single massage to one partner, with the other partner either watching the whole sensual massage, or to one partner with the other partner watching and joining in, or having one partner giving the sensual massage with the therapist throughout. Additionally, with longer sessions, two massages can organised – one for each individual within the couple with the same options above. In essence, the massage can be tailored to fit with the specific needs and desires of each couple.
The Psychosensual And Sexual Journey In Sensual Massage
After the first sensual therapy appointment couples sometimes feel able to continue on their own. However, often with this whole new relationship to sex and intimacy revealed to them they come back and take more appointments. This may be for further Psychosensul treatments, or just for the sensual bodywork in Couples Massages. For ongoing sexual relationship development, therapists often recommend couples take private workshops, or attend couples group sensual massage workshops.
What Can Sensual Massage Achieve For Couples?
By talking things through with a sexual therapist, couples can better understand how their sexual behaviour is connected to their overall emotional dynamic – something that usually stems from unconscious strategies developed in early life. By looking back at a time when your emotions were being developed, and how your environment and the people within it influenced that development, sexual therapists can create a treatment that provides an alternative experience that helps stop your mental defense strategies from being triggered. Receiving sensual massage quiets the mind, and the hormones produced are the same ones that are released when we have good sex. Dopamine and Oxytocin are released when we are consensually touched, and this relaxes people and arouses them at the same time. This can also create a sense of trust. The body then is more likely to respond positively to sensual touch going forward, which can lead to increased arousal. Often the arousal in sexual massage therapy sessions can reach a level that has not been felt before.
Transforming Relationships Through Sensual Bodyworks
Going to a sexual massage therapist or any treatment or workshop can give couples both a new perspective on how to relate to sex and sexual intimacy, as well as an understanding of how vital foreplay and sex play is to maintaining a fulfilling sex life. After a little as two to three years, sexual intimacy for couples can become sedentary, boring, unfulfilling and even antagonistic. By renegotiating the sexual relationship, and by hearing how each relates to sex, a couple can transform their sexual and intimate connection. Hearing the wants they each have, the desires they may fantasise about, and understanding any fears and curiosities they may have, an unfulfilled couple can transform the sex in their relationship from being the elephant in the room, to something that makes them both feel seen and fulfilled.
You Don’t Need A reason To Enjoy Sex, It’s A Basic Human Right
Sexual intimacy and sexual pleasure may appear to be mostly a physical thing, but without the right mental environment, one of the most crucial and healthy parts of being human can become a silent war zone that can eventually cause a break up, ill health, and bitterness. To go to a sexual therapist or sexual masssage therapist should not be seen as a desperate move, but rather as a brave and sensible decision.
An Investment That Can Change Your Life
Understanding one’s own sexual psychology and physiology, as well as your partners’, means you can communicate better about what you like, don’t like, or want to explore. Understanding the psychology behind a desire, fantasy or fetish can help a couple journey together, whether they share those same fantasies and motivations or not.
For more information on psychosensual massages and treatments, check out Colin Richard’s website Intimacy Matters. Regular KK workshop host Jessica Parker has more information about her courses on her website, and of course make sure you check out the KK Workshop and Masterclass for more information on upcoming sessions.
There are also more conventional therapy options available for people seeking help with sex and relationships. Check out some of the links bel0w to discover more.
COSRT – College Of Sexual and Realtionship Therapists
Written by the Killing Kittens team.