At Killing Kittens, everyone apart from cis-gender men is welcome to identify as a Kitten. This includes cis-gender women, trans people of all genders, non-binary people, gender non-conforming people, gender expansive and gender fluid people, as just a few examples! The identity of Kitten (or Guest, for cis-gender men) does not need to be a part of our members’ identities beyond how they function for the purposes of our events. However, we know many Kittens for whom their Kitten identity has become an integral part of who they are, which we love.
Why we joined Killing Kittens
G and I have always had a great sex life. After five years of marriage, the spark was still there. However, one Saturday last year we got talking about fantasies, a more honest conversation than ones we had previously, and we came to realise that we both shared the same desires that we had never spoken about before. That conversation was an awakening for us, and over the year we discussed whether we would like to explore these desires further. We conducted a bit of basic internet research and very quickly discovered the Killing Kittens site.
We didn’t sign up to Killing Kittens straight away. The thought of joining terrified us! It felt like a big step. Yet another Saturday night, we sat together, with a glass….okay, a bottle…of wine, laptop in front of us, Killing Kittens site open, and we did it, we joined.
What Killing Kittens offered us
The weeks that followed were incredible. Simply joining the site, talking to like-minded couples and singles about their experiences, not only put us at ease but also increased our curiosity about the parties. We were very aware that if we didn’t bite the bullet and book, we never would. So we found ourselves booking our first event. Our first party was in 3 weeks time! We questioned whether we were ready. A lot of ‘what ifs’ remained. We reassured ourselves we were going for a great night, cocktails, dancing in a great location and, more importantly, to enjoy each other.
From joining to the first party
Fast forward three weeks, and we were sat in the back of an Uber, dressed to impress, masks in hand. The three cocktails I had drunk at the hotel bar seemed to have suppressed my nerves but I couldn’t say the same about G. The car pulled up, we stepped out, ready (or not?) for our first KK experience…..
When we walked towards the house, I was aware that G was ready to turn and run, but watching the attractive couple in front filled me with excitement. I questioned why I was so calm. What was wrong with me? Why wasn’t I nervous? Am I odd? Did I have too much to drink?
We gave our names to the gentleman on the door and once we were inside were greeted by extremely friendly staff. The chat was informal, they explained the layout, and the event, it was clear that they were used to easing the nerves of ‘newbies’. I watched the couple who had arrived before us struggling with their masks and quickly realised that we weren’t the only ones attending their first party.
Inside the event
We sat in the basement bar with our glass of bubbly surrounded by others in masks, some couples, some singles. The atmosphere though relaxed was tinged with anticipation. I noticed people looking at each other from behind their masks. It was so erotic scoping out the glamorous outfits and wondering what was going through peoples minds.
I sensed that G still wasn’t at ease with the situation. We began chatting with a couple who were also attending for the first time. They explained how nervous they felt, and how they had almost turned around at the door. Knowing others were feeling the same way certainly helped G to relax. We were all in it together!
Everyone knows that what happens at a Killing Kittens party stays at a Killing Kittens party, so I will refrain from sharing any details. I will say, however, that the nerves soon subsided and the night exceeded both of our expectations!
The morning after the night before
I would imagine that most couples that are looking to attend their first party wonder how they will feel the next day? I certainly asked myself a lot of questions. Would I feel guilty? Like I cheated? Would I feel jealous? Would we love each other less? Most importantly, would we regret it?
Waking the following morning, a little hazy from the cocktails, I rolled over, looked at G and we both burst out laughing. In this one moment, I realised that there were no regrets.
We spent the day walking around London, talking about the night before. Of course, we talked about the physical experiences that we had, but we talked a lot more about how we felt. We were both surprised at how much closer we felt as a couple.
We’ve always had a tight relationship, but sharing this experience from beginning to end had bonded us. It was a first for both of us and we were proud of each other for seeing it through side by side. We didn’t back out when nerves got the better of us and had a night we will always remember.
I felt in awe of my husband, and he felt the same of me, we saw each other in a different light. We both exuded a newfound confidence, and our relationship had become secure in a way we could not have foreseen. It didn’t make sense to us that this experience could make us feel more in love with each other, but it did.
We’ve talked a lot more since our first party, about our relationship, but in the time that has passed, I have also had the opportunity to reflect on how the entire KK experience has affected me.
I have always had a large sexual appetite and have been sexually adventurous, but have often felt judged, and dare I say it, ashamed because of it. However, through joining the KK site and attending my first party I have quickly realised that there is nothing wrong me. I have found an environment where I can be me.
A fellow Kitten referred to feelings of empowerment when describing her KK ‘journey’, and this has resonated deeply with me. I am proud of my sexuality, and with the help of KK, and my husband, I am learning to embrace it. I have never been happier.
Our thanks to Kitten C for chatting to us! We’re so glad you and your partner G are feeling closer than ever after your KK experience.
Why not join us at Killing Kittens and see what we can do for you?
Written by the Killing Kittens team.